I was reading this chapter today and the Lord stopped me cold on this verse. I felt him calling to me as my husband asking me the same questions. I have managed to dip into a bit of a reclusive slump here in Las Vegas. The searching and seeking has seemed to be fruitless so far and I have felt my heart shutting down to anesthetize the ache in my heart for home, friends, church family. I try not to look back but to pres son and look forward. It can be very challenging when there seems little to keep this over active personality busy. Praise God for the Uganda Missions Trip! I miss my daughter and my Divine by Design Diva's. My sister-friends that have been like family. It has left an enormous hole in my heart and life. I have felt the distance growing between me and my Lord and have hit periodic funks of numbness as I retreat further and further into myself. Pulling my famous "Turtle" where I become a recluse until I can find my way back to solid ground, purpose and direction. "Am I not more to you then 10 sons?" This morning this heartfelt plea from my "Husband" were as a splash of cold water to a slumbering soul. Yes Lord, you are more to me than 10 sons or daughters, you are more to me than anything. I will be satisfied in you. Help me to remember that the isolation in the desert is not punishment but discipline that will reap a harvest of righteousness and peace as I press into you and continue to seek after you relentlessly until I find you. If you are silent, if you seem distant, you have not forsaken me but are simply, lovingly, gently guiding and growing me.
Eph 5:13-14 "But everything exposed by the light becomes visible, 14for it is light that makes everything visible. This is why it is said:
"Wake up, O sleeper,
rise from the dead,
and Christ will shine on you."
